Posted on September 26, 2011 - by

What Makes it Stick?

We were delighted to be commissioned for a third TV drama pilot by Redroofs Theatre School. Once again, the 30 minute drama was directed by Rupert Such (EastEnders, Casualty, The Bill) and screened at BAFTA in 2011.

Here’s an excerpt from the piece – it’s a great monologue.

What Makes it Stick?

Keen & Pandini | 2011


IMOGEN runs the Speed Dating night. She is standing in the corridor waiting for her last few daters to arrive. IMOGEN is to speed dating what David Brent is to stationery. Unsuited. She is quite fierce, unsentimental, says the wrong thing and scares people. Her phone rings. She answers it with a deep sigh.

What? (PAUSE) Good. Sort the stuff out. Divide it into piles. Build a wall down the middle of the bedroom for all I care. (PAUSE) Yes, I know you are threatening to leave me. But couldn’t you just text it? I’m working you know? (PAUSE) What? Typical? Typical of me to be working while you sit around all day playing Death Slaughter Psycho Mayhem Four? Yes, isn’t it.

IMOGEN walks a little way down the corridor looking for daters. No one. She looks at her watch.

Pardon? Yes I am listening. I just haven’t got time for this right now. (PAUSE) No, I don’t know where your World of War DVDs are. Next to the pile of cookery books? Hang on.

JAKE and BEN appear at the end of the corridor. They walk up to IMOGEN. IMOGEN covers the mouth piece on the phone and turns on the charm. It almost works but she can’t quite get the sincere smile thing right.

Hello boys! Here for the speed dating? Lovely, do go in.

IMOGEN points BEN and JAKE to the door of the room, then turns and walks away.

Tasty Road Kill for Carnivores. No? Well if they aren’t by the cookery books I don’t know… (PAUSE) Shit, do we have to do this now? (PAUSE) Fine. Fine, fine, fine. OK. I get it. I’m not showing you enough attention, you are a romantic soul who needs to be loved and I’m failing you – although quite when I am supposed to show all this affection I don’t know. (PAUSE) What I mean is, you’re always shooting or hunting or slaughtering or mortal combatting, aren’t you, so how am I suppose… (PAUSE) Whatever. OK. Keep them all. Put them in your special pile. Except the films I need for work. You can have all the sodding DVDs… (PAUSE) Yes! Even the history of slasher movies. But I need my work films. (PAUSE) Brief Encounter, Notting Hill, Love Actually and Titanic. Touch those and you’re a dead man.

IMOGEN hangs up and storms down the corridor.



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